Tammy, now in her mid-thirties, knows she hasn’t changed in temperament since she was a child.  “Since I was two years old, “ she recalls, “No one could tell me what to do.”

She takes great pride in doing things for herself, making her own decisions and choices.  Although life has not always been easy for her, Tammy was able to make a decent life for herself, working as a preschool teacher/director and as a foster mother.  She raised two sons and even adopted two of her foster children, all of whom she home-schooled.

Stricken with bone cancer, Tammy underwent a bone marrow transplant several years ago.  As part of her recovery she moved to Yakima, Washington where the drier climate eased the pain in her joints.

It was in Yakima that Tammy began to feel that perhaps she was not in control any longer.  A relationship with a boyfriend turned sour, and she found she was powerless to distance herself from the man’s jealously and possessiveness.  “I felt like he put me in a box, and if I tried to leave the box, he would drive me back in.”  At first, the control took the form of intimidation and emotional blackmail.  But soon it turned to stalking and, finally, to a physical confrontation.

With her ex-boyfriend jailed on domestic violence and other charges, Tammy decided to take back her life at whatever cost.  When the police warned her of his imminent release, she quickly packed up her children, put all her belongings in storage, and with only a few dollars in her pocket, drove back to Seattle and an emergency family shelter.  Her oldest son, at 18, was not allowed to stay at the shelter and had to move in with relatives.

Although she had taken the first step toward independence, Tammy found the road cluttered with more hurdles than she had bargained for.  Her application for unemployment assistance was turned down.  Why?  Because she had taken the initiative and left before her boyfriend was released from jail.  This meant she could not prove that she was in imminent danger and, therefore, she shouldn’t have quit her job.  Jobs were available, but none that would pay enough to feed the three children living with her (two of them were in their teens) and pay for rent and transportation.

Things were looking pretty desperate when shelter staff received a fax from The Homelessness Project (THP) notifying them of an opening for a single mother with two or more children in one of their houses.  Tammy fit the bill.

Tammy was grateful for any type of shelter that would allow her to relax for a few months and to bring her son back to live with them, together as a family.  However, she was unprepared for the extent of her welcome at the THP house.  Her description of the house sounds like a real estate ad: “…a big, beautiful house, with a formal dining room, and a kitchen with an eating space.”  Tammy continues, “Everything we needed was there when we arrived – food, furniture, even toilet paper!”

Today, three months after entering the program, Tammy is back on her feet quite literally, working two jobs teaching preschoolers.  She has begun a weekend master’s degree program in education and hopes eventually to run her own preschool program again.  She has straightened out her finances and has begun to work through the emotional burden the last few years have left on her and her children.  Most of all, she has found her dignity and self-respect again.

Tammy’s THP case manager sees her as a very self-sufficient and feels she has done little but link her with the appropriate services.  Tammy sees it differently, “Without (my THP case manager) and The Homelessness Project I would be back in Yakima.  She listened to me, talked to me, and help me take things one step at a time when I was so confused I didn’t know whether to get dressed or not.  They have been wonderful!”

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